Pirate Sighting

I've seen real pirates before.

Once, a few years ago (2003 I think) I had gone to the Route 60 Wal-Mart to get new tires around 9am. After wandering aimlessly around the store for a while, I settled at the in-store McDonalds for some breakfast. I sat at a corner table quietly reading the paper and eating my bagel-thing, when I look up and see....pirates. There were three, all decked out in pirate garb, head to toe. They all had shoulder-length hair or longer, one haid a small braid on one side, bandanas on their heads (two read, one leather). One had on a black loose shirt (not a Seinfeld 'puffy' shirt, just a loose dress shirt) and the other two wore white. They wore the piratey pants, boots and those colorful things they tie around their waist. After ordering their breakfast, the took their payment out of the booty-bag (the leather pouch) hooked to their waistband. They waited on their trays and then parked themselves at a table a couple away from mine. Of course, the paper and my breakfast had been long forgotten at this point. I had to use my hand to close my mouth, I was so shocked. Luckily they didn't seem very into making eye contact, so I'm pretty sure they didn't see my awe. I sat very still for a while, observing, thinking, and trying to figure out what I should do. One question kept making it's way to my thoughts, put I kept pushing it aside, labeling it absurd.

Then the announcement came. The tire and lube center alerted me that my car was ready to roll. I stood up and threw my paper and breakfast away, and as I passed by the pirate table I made a decision. I had to say something. So, I timidly walked over and cleared my throat.

"Excuse me, fellas, I'm sorry to interrupt your meal, but I'd really like to ask you a question, if that's okay." I said.

The pirate with the long hair and braid looked me up and down, sort of sizing me up, and said, "Let me guess. You want to know if we're real pirates."

"Well, no..." I started, but he interrrupted.

"Then you want to know if we've got a cannon on our ship. Or if we really make crooks walk the plank. Or if we really say 'arrr' and 'yo ho ho'.Or if we rape and pilage." He said, visibly agitated.

"No no no and no." I said, waiting to be yelled at, by scary pirate guy.

"Then what is it miss? What would you like to know?" He asked. I'm guessing curiousity got the best of him.

"It's just that, the river is quite a few miles from here. I was just wondering, if you in fact do sail around on a boat, how on earth did you get to Wal-Mart?"

For a moment, all they did was stare at me. Then the two I hadn't spoken to, began laughing. Hard. The leader guy (I can't call him 'Captain' as he lacked a hat.)

"Well, I say, that's a first." He said, then informed me that They were in fact pirates who did sail around, BUT they lived in West Virginia, in different parts, and they get together (by driving cars) once in a while. The guy with the boat wasn't with them at the time (I'm guessing he's the captain) That was simple enough. So I thanked them and went on my merry way, got my car and came home.

How I wish I had had a camera on me.

And now, to wrap things up, I give you a quote from Cabin Boy:

Skunk: We're just here to catch fish and stink.
Paps: Mostly the latter

I think that about sums it up!