Lola

"Lola"

(Preface: When I wake up in the morning, rather than pop right out of bed and start the day, I usually lay in bed a few moments, waiting for the dream-induced fog to lift from my brain. While I'm doing this, I tend to think. A lot. I'm amazed at the thoughts that come forth during this time. They are always things I've forgotten over the years and they've usually been put away for a good long while. But, rather than let them float around in my brain, I've decided to put them to use. Some things will be hard to put in story form, but I feel like I need to do this to (hopefully) flush them out. I could have kept them to myself, but being a fan of the (any)written word, I decided to share. So share or don't. It's your call)


Junior year of high school, I had what I believe to be the biggest variety of friends that I'd ever had or have had since. One group of friends delighted me almost as much as my "posse" (which will appear in latter pieces. We were the "Home Ec. Crew" as dubbed by our teacher. This group consisted of four girls who'd spent the previous semester getting to know one another in a similar class. Myself as well as long time friend Sara and new acquaintance, Shawna were involved in the group. But, the best part (for me at least) was Lola. Lola, a sophomore, was quite possibly the most fun friend I've ever had. We didn't look at all alike (she was short where I was tall, she was blonde, where I was jet black) but what we had in common went beyond that. She and I just clicked. We fed off each other. We seemed to have an almost psychic connection to one another. We hung out on occasion usually after school or just chatting on the phone, but we ended up going to basketball games with one another quite often. She and I acquired boyfriends around the same time. Her boyfriend was a promising freshman basketball player, Justin. Mine, was just promising, Brad. She, Brad and I would head to games together (I drove as I was the only one legally able) to watch Justin and the other boys defeat the competition. Sometimes it was just she and I.
This arrangement lasted all season, we watched out boys go on to the state championships. We talked endlessly as we listened to the radio, hoping they'd win (because we couldn't follow them to the games), and when they lost on the second out of three nights of ball, we went out for a consoling ice cream together.
But, when the boys came back, things started to change. The following week at school, another girl in our class pulled me aside to tell me that she'd seen Lola's Justin holding hands with another girl at the movies over the weekend. This girl, Jennifer for future reference, I believed because she had a four year old and husband/boyfriend at home. Why would she lie about something so petty? So I, thinking I was being a good friend by telling her (after all, if it was me, I'd want to know), took Lola aside and broke the news to her. I remember telling her I wasn't POSITIVE it was true, but pointed out my source and her status. Lola, immediately lost it. She cried harder than I'd ever seen anyone cry until then. I hugged her and told her that it would be okay, that we'd get to the bottom of things. I snuck out of class (she'd asked me to do this actually) and pulled Justin out of his class and asked him the hardest question I'd ever had to administer.
"Were you at the movies with Starr this weekend?" I asked him flatly.
He paused a moment, taking a good look at me before he replied.
"No." he said, matching my tone.
I brought him up to date with the happenings of that morning and at the end of my speech, he grabbed my arm and ran with me behind him to my classroom. Lola was still in the lounge where I'd left her. He snuck through the side door and they spoke, well, he spoke, Lola cried, until our teacher discovered him, and threw him back where he'd come from.
In the coming days, Lola and Justin broke up, and then made up. Things were fine between she and I for the first few days after everything had settled, but slowly, she started removing herself from my life. She started off not calling in the evenings when she normally would. Then between classes, she'd stay glued to Justin instead of roaming around as her usual M.O. had been. Finally, I arrived in class early one day and sat down at "our" table. Only, when she came in, she sat on the opposite side of the room. I just stared at her, not being able to move, but realizing what recent events had been leading up to. She looked back at me, and I managed to give her a sad half-smile before looking away. We never met eyes again after that. In fact, we only spoke one time after that. But that's another story for another day.
I've kicked myself so many times in the years since that's happened. I'm not even sure if they are still speaking. Statistically speaking, it's unlikely. I wish I hadn't said anything to her, or at least had waited to get 'all the facts' before even mentioning it. But that wish and a nickel will buy you a piece of gum at the general store. It's pointless to wish I'd done it differently. I did it this way, and lost a great friend. That's what matters.

For this story's sake, and let's face it, out of curiosity, I googled Lola. There was exactly one match for the girl I was looking for. At age 16, She had filled out a questionnaire in someone's slam book. I skimmed all the replies, but stopped short on the last one. My breath caught and my heart tightened a bit as I read it. The question asked he "What's the best thing in your life right now?" She replied simply "My boyfriend". I realized then, why it had been so important to leave me behind. Even though I hadn't meant to, I almost took that away from here.
Even though this was one of the 'great losses' of my life, I learned not to give advice regarding the personal lives of friends. And I haven't. Not one time since. Lesson Learned.