My Heart.

Things have been absolutely irritating this past week. I've talked to people I don't want to, and the people I do want to (one in particular) either want to have nothing to do with me, or are too busy to talk.

Which is probably why my heart exploded on Tuesday.

There I was, at work, thinking about the appointment I was supposed to be at around 3 (apartment interview thing) and I realized I wasn't going to get finished at work on time. I was worried I'd be late so I felt my heart beating a little faster. The I made it out with just enough time to spare only two people I went to High School with stopped me to talk on the way to my car. Each time I had to stop, my heart beat a little faster. I finally made it in and got halfway through the interview process only to be informed that I. Make. Too. Much. Money. to live in the crazy-nice new apartment building I've had my eye on for two months. (Apparently the person I'd been talking to on the phone failed to say "Yes" when I asked "Are these apartments income based?" *Sigh*)

So I leave the hotel conference room, and I feel my heart pounding away in my chest, getting faster with each step I took. While I was waiting for the elevator, I started thinking about all kinds of stuff. Mostly the mess that is my life right now, and the personal business going on this particular week. By the time the elevator had climbed it's way up, I was in tears. By the time I had made it out to my car, I couldn't breathe. I leaned forward and laid my head on my steering wheel until my eyesight got clear again and I could once again see the health department next door. Then I went home.

Since then, I've woken up every morning, evening, whatever with a hard-pounding heart.

The holidays are definitely a stressful time of year!